This is just beautiful. While watching this, I couldn’t help but think of the last time I saw my father. He was walking away from dinner after we had a petty argument about something I can’t even remember. I remember seeing him walking, that shirt he always wore and the silhouette I knew so well. I remember thinking how badly I wanted him to just turn around and let it go. I remember realizing that I was finally getting to know who he was. While living with him, I never truly knew him. I wanted to know more. I wanted to know his life. I wanted everything…We didn’t talk for a week.
The very next friday, I got a call. That was the first time I had absolute chaos. I had no control. All I could do was scream with my chest pounding. My fist clenched to the the point of bleeding. That image. That birds eye view of seeing him laying. It’s been 6 years and it comes to me clear still. I was angry at him for being a stubborn prideful asshole. I hated myself for letting the silence go for as long as it did. I hated that I was finally getting to know him. I felt abandoned. I was abandoned. I knew at that point I wouldn’t see his laugh any more. Or how he would bite his tongue. I hated how he would lecture me but I knew I would miss that as well. I would even miss what I hated, I missed him so.
So, when I say this video is just beautiful, that’s what I mean. That this entire personal story that I usually don’t share causes me to remember how important people are. How the simple arguments don’t matter but the simple hugs do. And I cherish that.